Sun, Apr 12, 2020
Read in 3 minutes
Seattle Hub, Washington, USA Originally from San Jose, California, USA
I was walking through the Arboretum here in Seattle when I saw a Barred Owl in plain sight. It looked like a little plush toy, quietly roosting and awaiting the darkening skies. This was the 5th barred owl that I had seen in broad daylight since the shelter-in-place mandate had been issued here in Washington. And it’s not just the owls. Tons of birds and animals are poking their heads out of their hidey holes as we humans enter ours. It made me reconsider the idea of doing a Big Year.
What’s a Big Year? It’s an informal competition for amateur birders to find the most number of bird species in a calendar year. The record for the North American Big Year is currently held by John Weigel, who saw or heard 839 unique bird species in 2019. I’ve never been as talented (or wealthy) to undertake my own Big Year, but I’ve always dreamt about it.
Lately though, I’ve found that many of my dreams have been put on hold, or completely thrown out. I always end up asking myself, “Why should the limited energy I have be used on myself and not on others?” I sound like a sanctimonious asshole (and maybe I am), but it’s caused quite a bit of anxiety in my life. How much do I give? How much do I give up? For the past few years, I’ve given up a lot because I felt it was the right thing to do.
Consider food and agriculture’s role in anthropogenic climate change. I’ve learned about the large carbon footprint of the agriculture industry that comes from the production, distribution, and consumption of food. For that reason, I gave up animal products to pursue a plant-based diet. It’s been a year and a half since I made that decision, and I’m proud of myself for sticking to it while also encouraging others to reduce their consumption of meat.
But what did I really give up? I mean, I definitely gave up eggs. I fucking love eggs. I used to eat 8 of them a day. But the real blow has been my strength. I’ve gotten more “brittle”, which has been a setback to my hobby as an endurance runner. One of my favorite things to do is to lace up my shoes and run a 50 kilometer trail through the mountains. But with each passing month, I find that my body takes longer and longer to recover and my injuries are getting more and more severe. Fuck, I mean, I’m writing this with an ice pack on my shin.
It feels like I substituted my passion for my “duty”. And am I doing the same again when I push my Big Year further away to focus on bettering the community? I feel that tons of people are facing this dilemma right now with COVID-19. We’ve been asked to social distance and shelter-in-place in order to keep the number of coronavirus cases at a manageable level for our healthcare facilities. Initial metrics show that shelter-in-place IS working here in Washington. But we’ll need to continue this behavior for the rest of the year to prevent recurring outbreaks. This means that many people will have to continue to put their dreams on hold for the greater good of the community.
Whether it’s climate change or COVID-19, we’re all going to face a similar question. What’s the right balance between duty and passion?